Breaking Point

Well, I shall start by apologising for not blogging in AGES... It just seems I have had more on my plate than necessary for that last couple of weeks... I might as well be honest with you all I've started my PHD and me and James have ended up decided we've took a break from each other.

Like we still love each other but he's been recruited to do some vet work work abroad on that donkey charity you may all have heard of and well basically we're both going to be so busy until Christmas so we've took a break to see how things go until then!

Surprisingly we're both coping with it very well - well I hope. I know I needed some serious BFF TLC!

Basically Ash has picked up all my pieces took me away from seriously thick books and helped me get my arse out of the house! Because apparently staying in doing work 24/7 and only leaving for shifts at the hospital is "Not good for you" to quote her as she was literally washing my hair for me at my work desk in my room!

Well for the first time in weeks I actually felt great!

She dressed me in my Prada dress my mum got me for graduation and my favorite green heels (As strange as they sound they're fab!) and we headed out for a night out. Now, Ash's idea was to go out and pull a student (Basically her 'love of her life' found a new girl on his jollies and now she feels a bit pied), mine was to go out and FORGET about men and relationships and just get a drunk as I possibly could!
Well my part of our plan well extremely well, so well in fact I threw up in the nearest toilets I could get to - which fortunately for the other women about was in the MEN'S toilets. Yes, I was projectile vomiting into a cubicle in the men's! When all of a sudden I heard "You alright mate?" It was some stranger outside the door, I simply spluttered out "I'm NOT boy I just feel sick!" - Oh the shame of being that person on the night out that even strangers wonder if you're alright. Well, I cleaned myself off and made my way out of the cubicle to which I was greeted by a guy holding a glass of water and a packed of Polo's!
I don't know what wad more embarrassing that fact that he was trying to help me or the fact I realised in the process of drinking the water I spilled it down myself then drunkly said "You can pat me dry" he laughed and said he would help me out to a taxi.

We stumbled outside, him basically carrying me and sat on a curb near by, with him giving me more water.
After about half an hour of silence and me trying to sober up I managed to force out an awkward thank - you. He said it was no problem and he was happy to help and that his night was pretty dull until me. Now, in my still slightly drunk state I took this as an insult and said "Oh glad my suffering has been amusing to you!" He apologised and explained he actually wanted to help me. He asked what was up with me and I didn't tell him my whole situation but enough to explain the drunken antics.

He was really understanding and asked if I need help getting home - by this point I saw Ash waiting by the taxi rank - prey in tow and snogging the face off him, and realised him helping me home was going to be more helpful than Ash so I agreed and we headed over to a taxi. I then did something I didn't expect myself to do. I said "Ash is going to be having crazy sex all night, can I sleep at yours? Not for sex, just for a place to stay." He said "Yeah, that's no problem. I have a flat round the corner with my brother, he's not in so you could sleep in his room"
The taxi drove us round and he piggy-backed me all the way to his third floor flat.
It was nice and not at ALL how I imagined two guys flat would be - basically because it was clean and tidy! He showed me to his brothers room and I collapsed on the bed. Dead to world until the sun crept through the window.

The next morning I did intend to sneak away without him noticing but he was one of the sickening morning people and was waiting for me in the kitchen with a pot of coffee. Now, there was NO sex involved but I couldn't shift the distinct feeling of the 'walk of shame' as I had last nights outfit on and shoes in had. But he didn't seem as arsed as me and I accepted the drink.

He gave me his number and added me on Facebook - even though I did protest and explain due to my PHD I wouldn't have time for it. But he insisted anyhow and he said he's walk me home. I refused as again the walk of shame' feeling still remained and he then said he's drive me.

He drove me home and I said thank you for everything with a hug. Now, with the hug, I thought he was going in for a kiss and he did help me, so I thought, it's the least I could do. Though from the shock he got from the kiss I don't think that was his exact intention. I did the only grown up thing I could think of said thanks and high tailed it out of there faster than my brain could process.

But it wasn't until later that day - after I'd decided to save myself from more embarrassment and never see him again - I realised I'd left my best shoes in his car! So now it's just the debate whether to or when to get them back!

What have I learnt from my antics?
- Never go out upset - it WILL lead to more upsetting times! Also, not all guys are actually after getting in your pants - that or he's gay!